Mission to Mars
by Zinator
Summary: Ed's comic books give Eddy his greatest idea ever. But is it as genius as it seems? Of course not. Join the Eds on their craziest adventure yet-to the black emptiness of space.
1. Chapter 1:Invaders from Mars

**Author's Note:** This is more of a teaser than the actual story, seeing as how short it is.

The blazing July sun shone down upon the small town of Peach Creek. The light covered the tops of the fruit trees for which the town was partially named, and reflected off of the flowing stream for which the town was also named. It bathed the landscape in layers of sunshine like the layers of a cake. In the center of town was a long street, with many small shops and stores along side it. At the edge of the town was a huge junkyard, filled with mountains of trash. Just beyond that was a large power plant, its smokestacks rising up towards the clear-blue sky, and huge power lines coming out of it and spreading out into the distance.

Spreading out from the center of town and extending for quite some distance were large suburban homes, each with a large backyard and front yard. Near the edge of town, close to the junkyard, was a large cul-de-sac, surrounded by eleven houses. Just behind the back fences of the homes was a small pathway, circling around the cul-de-sac and going out towards the power plant. The pathway separated the cul-de-sac with a trailer park and a second cul-de-sac, which was surrounded by half-built homes.

One of the homes of the first cul-de-sac mentioned had a tall tree in its backyard, and sitting beneath this tree was a young boy who appeared to be about twelve or thirteen years old. The boy was short, with three hairs sticking out of the top of his head, and wore a yellow-

"I'm _BORED!_" Eddy shouted suddenly, breaking the silence. His voice rang out through the cul-de-sac, drawing the immediate attention of a second boy, Eddy's best friend, Edd.

"I suppose you're going to tell me why you're wasting this perfectly good summer day trying to drown out the silence, Eddy." Edd walked into Eddy's backyard, wearing a red shirt, a black ski cap that resembled a sock, and a bored expression.

"Bout time you got here!" Eddy said, standing up to his full height, if you could even call it height. "I've been waiting for you to show up for like three and a half minutes now! I need ideas!"

Edd rolled his eyes, something he did more often than was probably healthy. "Ideas? Eddy, may I remind you how this works? You get the ideas, I plan them out, and Ed-"

"Ed!" Eddy interrupted. "Where is that doofus?"

"Knowing Ed, reading comic books."

"Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go!"

The two adolescences departed the yard, strolling across the road towards Ed's house. When they reached it, they ignored the front door and went to the side of the house. Near the ground was a small window. Inside, Edd and Eddy could see a purple-colored basement with a sheetless mattress; a table with several models of monsters, rocket ships, and airplanes; a bathroom with a gravy-filled bathtub; and movie posters splattered across the walls. Eddy opened up the window and squeezed himself inside, quickly followed by Edd.

Ed looked up from his comic book, _Attack of the Martians_. "Hiya guys!" he said.

"Hey Ed." Eddy said. "What's up?"

"I was just reading a comic book." Ed showed Edd and Eddy the cover of the comic. "I am at the part where the Martians trap the colonists from Earth and roast them over a bonfire in the glorious name of Char-chu!"

"Sounds interesting." Edd said.

"That's it!" Eddy looked up suddenly. "Guys, I know what we're going to do today!"

"Study the rich geology of Mars?" Edd guessed.

"Fight demon monsters from-" Ed tried, but Eddy cut him off.

"Nope! Boys, pack your bags, 'cause we're going to the Red Planet!"

Ed was ecstatic. Edd was horrified.

"Go to Mars!?" Edd shouted, sounding as if he were plunging into the dark depths of a black hole. "Have you lost your _mind?" _

"Ooo! Ooo!" Ed shouted. "Can I meet Doctor Joeson and his attractive female acquaintance?"

Edd continued freaking out. "There's no way we could make it there! We don't have the resources! We don't have the manpower! And most importantly, we don't have the time! A trip to Mars would take weeks! Months! What would our parents think!?"

Eddy dismissed his friend's concerns with a wave of his hand. "Relax, Sockhead! It'll be fine! We'll grab some stuff from the junkyard, you can design it, Ed can build it, and I can drink lemonade in the shade!" He put an arm around Edd. "We'll put some stuff together, head over there, and be back in time for dinner!"

Edd tried to regain his composure. "Eddy, I believe you don't understand the basics of space travel. Distances between two bodies in space are much farther apart than they seem. Even the moon, the closest thing in the sky to us, took several days to reach."

"You know what they say, Double-D." Ed raised a finger, showing he was trying to make a point. "A bird in the hand is worth two in the spaceship."

Eddy grinned. "See? Even Lumpy's on board. Come on, it'll be fun!"

Edd sighed. "Well, I suppose that's better than being chased by Sarah all day. All right, I'm in."

Eddy immediately began giving orders. "Monobrow, get something heavy. Double-D, get some paper and a pencil. I'll grab some jackets and fish bowls. Let's go, people!"


	2. Chapter 2: Radiation Protection

Sweat dripped down Edd's face as he dragged the steel beam across the junkyard. He couldn't believe Eddy had talked him into this. This was probably Eddy's worst idea yet, even worse than when Eddy decided to push the red button. This was beyond crazy. It was just… stupid. There was no other word for it.

Edd looked up towards the cloudless sky. The sun beat down upon him relentlessly, creating strange mirages along the junkyard. The junkyard was enormous. The ground as covered in dirt, mixed in with small pieces of twisted metal and old plastic toys. Mountains of trash shot up towards the sky, seeming higher than ever in the summer heat. They were made of every piece of trash that had been thrown away within a hundred miles of Peach Creek in the last hundred years. It was like a planet in one of Ed's comics.

Finally, Edd reached a clearing where Eddy was looking up at a huge metal frame. Ed was inside the frame, wielding two steel beams together. Eddy turned to face Edd, his huge trademark grin plastered on his face.

"Nice catch, Double-D." He looked back at the frame. "I think that's the last of 'em."

"Right." Edd wiped buckets of sweat off his forehead. "Anything else you need me to drag down here?"

"No, you're good." Eddy pulled out a clipboard and pen out of his baggy shorts and checked off another box. "Ed's gunna finish up the frame and then start putting on the outside walls. Meanwhile, you and me are gunna go plan what we need to bring."

Edd pulled a bottle of water out of his pocket, drank it down, and swallowed. "Well, first of all we're going to need space suits, since the Martian atmosphere does not contain enough oxygen for us to breathe, and Mars doesn't have a magnetic field as strong as Earth's, so we'll need protection from radiation while on the surface-oh, and we'll have to implement defenses against radiation in the ship, too- and we'll need food and water for a few weeks, as well as storage to protect it from radiation-"

"What's so bad about this radiocean stuff, anyway?" Eddy interrupted.

"_Radiation_, Eddy. Basically, radiation is particles that can pass through solid surfaces. If you get exposed to it, it'll pass through your skin, get into your cells, mess with your DNA, and can give you cancer."

"Oh." Eddy looked back down at his sheet and wrote something down. "Well, you'd better start on the suits, and I'll go help Ed with the ship."

Eddy walked back over to Ed. Edd turned away and started walking out of the junkyard.

"Stupid, stupid, stupid." Edd said to himself. "This is crazy. This is insane." He looked back at Ed and Eddy, who were involved in a fierce debate. "Why do I even bother with those two?"

"Ed, you idiot! You were supposed to get thicker plates! The lead-lined kind!"

"But, Eddy, look at it! Isn't it cool?"

Eddy picked up the metal plate, which had graffiti all over it, and smacked Ed upside the head "You moron! We have to protect ourselves from the radiocean, remember?"

"What's radipation?" Ed asked.

"It's _radiocean_, lunkhead. And it's what you'll be eating if you don't get the right kind of plating!"

"It sounds delicious! I think I'll bring some to the next neighborhood picnic! Do you think it would taste better with gravy on it?"

Eddy groaned. "You can bring whatever you want to the picnic. Just get the plating already!"

"Righto, boss-man!" Ed ran off and dove into a mountain of trash.

**Author's Note:** I know nothing about radiation.


End file.
